Recencies...hehe.

Updating. And I SWEAR I'm gonna get better at this. I STILL need to write about Brooklyn, and It's already September anyhows.

I think I'm going to do another real honest post. Because it's 10:50 pm and I'm having tea.

So it's been a few weeks since I've been back from MN (7 weeks, actually). I've met so many good, genuine, inspirational people at my new school. I already feel like I'm more deeply-rooted and belong where I am now. It's a peculiar feeling, you know, to not have any sense of anxiety when I step into work (for me, at least). To know that you will be treated with respect by your boss (and truly admire him, too!). I almost feel like it's unheard of. You know, to have what you want.

Truly, I'm happier now than I've ever, ever been in my adult life. If you've been following this blog since I was 23 (Eee!), you may be able to see my pattern of being unable to be at peace in any given situation. I would always be rushing through things, being efficient, but for what? I'm realizing that life is all the stuff. Not just the reward at the end of whatever task. This sounds like a John Lennon lyric, but I swear I've discovered this sentiment in my own right.

Anyway, I'm constantly busy. I work so hard outside of the classroom (not in it). But life is all these things. Every footstep, every swallow, every blink...beat. And yes--I have been making breakthroughs with my life as an anxiety game show host. Peace is the byproduct.

I feel like every student I have is precious. I connect with them more. They just rule. I'm so glad I didn't give up teaching. I'm happy. I mean I'm still living in reality, and it's not perfect, but I feel like all is well and what a journey it has been in Austin.

By the way, I'm not dying. Haha..I sound too dramatic here. But I feel like I have to say it. Because I sure did enough grumbling up until this point.

Here's me tonight (before my date with H) looking pretty spry:

And me last Thursday night, a lil' dead from work.


Hope all is well my loves. Be seeing you soon XO

State testing week...

TAKS...last year of it, but TAKS...ugh!

What to do, what to do?

(**Deep, again. Sorreee**)

Goddang! I can blog about life all the livelong day today! I seriously feel like I could write a book about all the layers surrounding me right now, and it will possibly take an Anna Karenina (or so) to make sense of it all. Am I as lost as I feel, and if it's true...is that bad?

Current topics of conversation (with myself)

1. Is the adventure/exploration occurring inside of me greater than the perceived outer adventure/obstacles (connotation depends on the day, blood sugar level, and sleep)?

2. How is that I feel so selfish and self-aborbed when I ponder my inner-workings? Should I dismiss the guilt (if I could)?

3. If I lived "in the moment" and rejected any possible worth of reflecting, would it matter?

4. Should I even be typing this?

My biggest concern right now, and maybe you could help, is a little bit about where I should live my life...and mostly about what I should do with it.

-Do I stay in Austin where the politicians are crazy, the jobs are scarce, the place be crowded, and most importantly be 1000+ miles away from my family?

(Good outdoor scene, lots of music, young people, festivals...good stuff, too!)

-And if I do stay here, I gotta be crafty. I don't mean ric-rac. I mean about securing a job (preferably not JOBS) that give me peace and enough money to able to live in a house that I can have my family visit (and not be 2 inches from the front door), pay my loans, afford my small (and safe) vehicle, buy nutritious groceries instead of BAR-S Franks wrapped in 62 cent generic sandwich bread. I want to find a way to travel, too, since it makes me feel alive. Is it greedy to want a yearly friv vacation? I know Europeans are always jetting off to the Maldives or Canary Island...so that's not at all a freakish request!

Here are things I have honestly pondered pursuing, probably today:

1. Open my own children's art school (home school/extracurric)

2. Enroll in Aveda's school...to make money & be pretty and not feel like a dog face.

3. Go to UT's graduate school for Art Education.

4. Enroll in Avenue 5 and become an esthetician and make people feel loverly!

5. Therapeutic recreation @ACC... using art to help well being!

6. Child Development Certificate @ ACC

7. Dental Hygenist? Don't ask, but it seems caring and $$ and solid!

Please, please, please, I don't want to let myself settle for less! With anything! I need to take purposeful steps, but I don't know my direction (yet). For now, though, everything is great(ish)...and I am hoping for a swift close to the school year! PLZ?!

Seen & heard...

• Here are some too cute/hilarious quotes from my ELL kids this week:

• J: "I'm gonna kick your A-C-C [to classmate]"


• Me: I think you mean "S", not "C".

• H: [inappropriately] "UGH, those aren't her real boobs; in real life they're all swaggy"


• Me: Not appropriate. Warning and then you're out! (SWEEEET) Me: [talking about a sweet pioneer story] "Can anyone explain what a 'shack' is?"




• M: "Yeah, it's like that big baskeball player, right? Shaquille O'Neal?"


• Me: No, they did not live inside a big basketball player...

HAHA

A post-work de-brief...

I'm going to tell you directly about my professional life, while leaving troublemaking details aside.

1. Picked up a co-worker sans car at 6:45am at my local Starbucks; grabbed a soy latte for a change (change from never getting coffee ever).

2. Had a perfectly professional first 4 periods of reading.

3. I now have a T.A. for English. Thanks! I seriously had the best 5/6 period I've ever had! Plz make this a trend. PLZ PLZ PLZ! How was I blessed with this? Oh wait. Thanks!

4. Spent my off periods interviewing children for the yearbook....'twas fun.

5. Wrapped up and came home feeling excellent!

7. Got home to lovey/needy cat, got my first Auto Finance bill (BOO) & this bogus note from our new property management company that said:

"Hello, I have left messages and text messages. I am walking the property tomorrow at 11am. I had planned to give you more notice, but due to the weather turning bad on Wednesday, was not able to."

PHONES DON'T WORK WHEN IT'S COLD?! Biggest load du jour! Hahahaha!