Friday, November 20, 2009

A new peace...


I'm having an accidental day off today, and would just LOVE to reflect! Thank you!

Things have been very peaceful and smooth lately, happy to report! This is due largely in part to a book I've been reading--a little about spirituality--that's been making me feel like letting go of things I've been unconsciously fighting all the time!

The book's called "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle, and yes, it is a bit out there...but Oprah liked it, so I will, too. Haha. No really, it's good.

I was going to write a post about sensitivity, and how I'm super sensitive. I have felt like crying at work a few times at work recently; I take everything personally. If someone says something about my looks or size, I analyze it on-and-off for, like, an hour or more.

"What did that mean?" "Should I work out more?" "Am I an OK human being?"

After getting a little insight from this book, I realize that I'm trying to improve the image of myself or my "ego" by what others think of me. I will feel defensive if someone says something I take personally, trying to improve my right, my ego. I really do this, and I'll admit it, shamefully. See? I'm even feeling shame to improve my ego.... Oh god...

Unlocking these paralyzing cycles in my mind is helping me feel more OK with everything... I try to live in the moment, instead of in my head. This book says in more ways than one, that the mind is an illness. Be devoted to your work, and just freaking relax....

Other things going on:

1. Prettifying the house. It's looking G-O-O-D.
2. Getting pumped for Thanksgiving and holiday shopping (not waiting 'til the last minute).
3. Future prospects ;)

Can you help? ONE thing I cannot get to be at peace with is running out of time...I feel like I'm always looking at the clock in my off time trying to make the most of it! I never have enough time to do everything I want...


merveilleuse said...

eckhart tolle, yes! his books are neat!

glad to hear that things are going well. xx